L'Histoire Triste
by Hidden Path
Summary: Jaina Segel is a fallen Jedi Knight with a dark past that haunts her present. Read into her past beginning with Ep. 1 era to Ep. 2 and switch to her present starts Ep. 2 to Ep. 3.
1. Chapter 1

**The Present**

He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck. She let out a low laugh, something of a giggle. Together, they drunkenly slammed against the wall of the hotel hallway. "Almost there," she whispered into his ear. He laughed on his own, but with her face turned away from him, she made a disgusted face. They slid along the wall for a moment longer, at last reaching the door to the room. She used the key he had had in his pocket and opened the door. There, with the uneven weight against her as the door opened, they slammed heavily against the wall just inside the room. She winced and was almost pushed to her limit, but let it last a moment longer. She glanced out into the hallway, closing the door against unwanted guests.

He guided her to the bed, attempting to throw her down on it. Instead, as though taking charge, she threw him down. She smiled slyly and leaned over towards him, him staring up at her greedily. He reached up for her, trying to kiss her on the lips. And suddenly, the scene drastically changed.

Jaina threw a punch at the man's face. He stared at her, enraged. "What was that for?" he demanded. She glared at him, turning her nose up.

"Where's the information you owe Darth Tyranus?" she whispered harshly, glancing around the room, taking a step back, brushing herself off disgustedly. "You owe it, and you have long missed your deadline. This is your last chance." He started to get up, but she hit him again, and he collasped upon the bed.

She turned around, taking a few steps to get to the table with a few dirty bags upon it. She reached out for the data pad. Then, quickly, she spun around, elbowing the man in the face. He fell back a few steps, just enough time for her to grab her lightsaber, the deep red blade humming to life. And seconds later, he lay still on the floor. She leaned over and took the small holographic file from his pocket, and then turned to leave through the window balcony.

"I don't care for second chances."

* * *

**The Past**

"If you'll please follow me, your Highness, I'll show the room where you will stay," Jaina said pleasantly. The Queen of Naboo nodded her decorated head and began to follow Jaina down the wide halls with her handmaidens. She finally reached the spot where the security had guarded the Queen's suite. She opened the door and walked ahead of her inside. "And here is where you shall stay under the safety of the Republic and the Jedi."

"Thank you, Mistress Jedi," the young Queen said, stepping inside past her. Jaina bowed slightly and left the room, her lightsaber hilt swinging at her side. She walked down the long hallways of the Senate building through the thick crowds of people. She was due back to the Jedi Temple in an hour to receive her next true mission.

She was nearing the exit to head towards a taxi when a man with silver hair brushed past her. She would have continued, had she not made a double-take and recognized him. He kept her gaze for a moment, and then walked purposefully away outside of the Senate building. Jaina quickened her step and followed him, continuing down an outside hallway of the building, somewhat of a porch to the building around the side of it. The crowds died down in this region, and at last, Jaina caught up with him as he stopped in the shadow of a pillar.

"Will I ever have the chance of seeing you again?" he asked softly. Jaina lowered her head, then looked up at him with sad eyes.

"I found I needed your help on that mission. I didn't know you would find me again and wish to see me more."

"Do you want me to just forget you forever?" The question stung her, even though they hadn't known each other long.

"No," she replied earnestly, barely above a whisper, just loud enough to be heard. She took a step forward. "But...I'm a Jedi. I'm not supposed..." Her voice trailed off. She looked up at his face longingly.

"I understand." He brushed past her and walked away. 


	2. Chapter 2

**The Present**

"You could warn me before I'm given jobs like that!" Jaina snapped angrily at her employer. The black-robed man continued to walk, the hood pulled up over his head and so low over his face that she could not see it.

"Do you have the information?" he asked slowly. She grabbed it out of her pocket and shoved it into his hands. He looked up at her solemnly. Though she could not see that face, she felt him peering out at her menacingly, and she took an involuntary step backwards.

"I could've been hurt in ways I'd like not to say if I wasn't the type that was prepared for that sort of thing," she said, quieting her voice a little.

"Yet you are fully capable, and I'm sure you took care of him well. In fact, I've already sent someone to clear the body and all evidence of his murder." Jaina glanced up at him quickly, for she had not yet told him of that. "I know what you did. It was necessary, and I congratulate you. There was no other way he could've lived. It was better that way. Now take your money. I'll contact you again when I have another job for you."

He walked quickly away before she could say a word and entered a ship, speeding away out of sight. She watched for a moment, and then left on her own. She made her way back to where the real city life on Coruscant was to a cantina. She went inside and sat down in the back by herself. However, it wasn't long before someone joined her.

"It won't be long before he finds a way to rid you from this Galaxy forever," he said. Jaina glanced up and smirked.

"Darth Tyranus. You seem to know where to find me. Where _do_ you get your information?" He glared at her before continuing.

"He knows you're emotionally unstable. And while that'll help you now with your anger as your guide and your fuel to the Dark Side, he'll eventually cut you off. He can see it, Jaina. How your almost to that edge. It won't be long before something happens that'll push your over it. And then what good will you be to him? He'll stop your employment. You will have outlived your use. But he won't leave you around to mess up any of his plans. He's too intelligent to let someone like you get in the way." He began to stand up and leave her.

"And how would you know this?" she snapped. "What proof is there of my emotions? I've done nothing but work for him these last ten years!"

"He knows your past, Jaina Segel. He knows it well."

* * *

**The Past**

Jaina waited patiently for the turbo lift to take her up to the very top floor of that tall building on Coruscant. The door slid open and she looked out into the the long, dark hallway. It was simple and clean, yet it didn't keep that strange eerie feeling from her. However, she stepped out into the hall and made her way to the very end of it, staring at the number of the door that she had been told to reach.

She reached out her hand to tap on it, but the door opened before she ever made a noise. No one was standing right inside, but she could recognize the figure a few steps away. She walked inside slowly and shut the door behind her.

"I told you it was a secretive place," Geist said quietly, leading her into his apartment. It seemed to follow the theme of the building, not messy, actually neat, but something strange still lingering about. He sat down on a couch in the small room and looked up at her.

"So," she started, somewhat nervously, "this is where you live." He nodded, for it was quite apparent, and the question was only to break the silence. With a small smile, she stepped forward and sat down silently beside him. "I'm not sure I should've come here," she said at last, the truth coming out.

Geist looked at first a bit impatient, but then sighed sadly. "Maybe it's wrong of me to push this relationship. You don't want it."

Jaina started and looked at him with that same longing look she had given him at the Senate building a few weeks before. "I want this more than I even should, more than I am allowed," she said passionately. "I know this is wrong of me. But I can't turn away. I can't forget about you. There's something that won't let me." 


	3. Chapter 3

**The Present**

Jaina reached inside her pocket and brought forth the key to the apartment in her hand. She inserted it into the lock and went inside the last door on the top floor of one of the highest buildings on Coruscant. She walked slowly forward and fell heavily onto the little couch that sat in the middle of room. She looked around at the emptiness, very little furniture, very little furnishings except for what was absolutely necessary. The only thing different however, was the life that was missing from those many years ago.

She looked up at the chair in the corner, finally realizing the shadow that sat there. She jumped up as it leaned forward. In the dim light that cast upon its face, she could see the figure of Geist sitting there.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded quietly.

"I came to see how you were doing," he replied just as softly.

"You haven't cared in these twelve years," she said harshly. "Why now?" He stood up and came to stay in front of her. Reaching out, slowly, he put his hand on the side of her face, touching it softly. At first, she closed her eyes. Then suddenly, she grabbed his arm and slowly pushed him away. "You can't expect after all this time and everything that happened for me to just let things go back the way they were."

Geist looked at her with such intensity she had to turn away. "Things can change," he said. "_You_ have changed. But not enough. Your life has only gotten worse. It's as though you're trying to kill yourself."

"I have nothing left to live for."

He gazed at her with a longing for the same love they had all those years ago to come alive again between them. Yet nothing could be done now. He turned and left quietly.

* * *

**The Past**

"This is torture to me, I hope you understand that," Geist said as she walked in through the door. "Every time we meet again, just to keep it secret and do nothing about it. And then it's even more miserable when you go off on missions and leave me behind."

"I'm sorry," she replied earnestly. He closed the door and touched her face softly, leaning over to kiss her. Once, and then again. Jaina finally broke off and went to sit on the couch. "Master Windu told me today that I am becoming slightly more distracted in my studies."

Geist sat next to her, putting an arm around her. "Is it my fault?" he asked.

"Of course it is!" she teased. She leaned forward to kiss him again. She then looked up at him seriously, keeping close. "They're going to find out eventually."

He held her closer still. "We'll have to be more careful than ever before. Especially after what I was going to ask you tonight." She looked at him expectantly, unsure of what he was going to say, excited yet nervous at the same time. "Will you marry me?"

She looked at him with a smile. "You know how badly I would want that."

"But you won't go through with it?" he asked. Her face fell, and she shook her head quickly. "I know I shouldn't ask you for this large of a sacrifice. But it seems right. It's the only thing in my life that does. And I can't just go on without doing this. I know you're not supposed to, because you're a Jedi. I will understand."

She looked at him with a sad sort of smile again. "I _will_ marry you. And whatever sin it is, I shall love you yet." 


	4. Chapter 4

**The Present**

Jaina followed him to the door and stopped as he closed it softly. She went to lean against the door, making a fist and hitting it with a thud against the back of the frame. She turned around and leaned against it, tears beginning to stream down her face. Slowly, she slid down the length of it to floor, bringing her knees up to her chest. Hugging them tightly, she was overtaken by deep, trembling sobs.

The past was settling into her mind, the old joy she had once had with the man whom had just left the room coming unbidden to her memory. She sobbed harder and harder until she was too worn out to cry anymore.

Her life was slowly coming to a ruin, and it was threatening to end her very being. Something would change very soon in her life, and if she did nothing to aid it, she would not like this change's result.

She slowly turned to lay upon the carpeted floor of the apartment, reaching up with one hand to roughing wipe her wet face. Then, hugging her knees tighter, curled up in a ball, she fell asleep in front of her door.

* * *

**The Past**

"Master Windu," Jaina said with a small smile. "I would like leave to go off on my own for a sort of meditation break. You said so yourself that I seem distracted. Perhaps this could help me."

Mace nodded. "Where are you going?"

"Dantooine," she replied. He looked up at her for a moment, just a second longer than he should have looked. A bit of doubt flickered over her mind.

"Then may the Force be with you. We expect you back in a few weeks. Take care."

Jaina bowed, turning to leave the room. She walked outside of the hallway quickly, going through the Jedi Temple towards the outside exit. _Did he know?_ she wondered. _Do they all know? How long will it be before they find out?_

She kept going her way, making more double takes along the way, seeming as though everyone she passed was looking at her with a knowing look, understood exactly where she was going. _They all know. Every one of them. How long will they keep up the charade? Are they following me? Will they be sending a spy to see where I'm going?_

Her breathing increased as she went faster and faster through the hallways of the Jedi Temple, until she was practically running. She turned the corner and ran straight into a fellow Knight, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

"Oh my!" he said with a laugh. "Be careful. You never know who else is coming around the corner." He smiled and walked off. _He knows too. Someone from my old training classes who knows me._

She finally reached outside and quickly got a taxi to the nearby hangar she was going to get to her ride. As she went inside the dark area, she found the correct ship and went up the ramp inside. It had already started closing as she neared the end of it and it shut completely just as she got inside. And seconds later, the ship had taken off. She stood still as it headed out of the hangar and up towards the atmosphere of Coruscant, heading into space for, not Dantooine, but Naboo.

She looked up and saw with a grin that Geist stood in the doorway outside of the control room now. "Ready, my bride-to-be?" he asked with a grin.

Jaina cast away all her cares and worries that had clouded her brain and ran to embrace him with a smile. 


	5. Chapter 5

**The Present**

Jaina still lay on the floor as she woke to the beep of her comm that sat on the table in front of the couch. She pushed herself up groggily and crawled over to the table, pushing the button to answer the call.

"Well you look absolutely lovely today," Sidious said in greeting. "Rough night?"

"What is it?" she said hastily. He chuckled before continuing.

"I have another mission for you. Meet me at the usual spot in half an hour." The transmission ended, and Jaina jumped up quickly. If she was to get there in that sort of time in a huge city like this, she'd have to leave _now_.

She hurried to change into fresh clothes, quickly running a brush through her thick curly brown hair. She washed her face off and ran out the door, wishing the turbo lift was a bit faster than it was. She made it down to the meeting place across the city just in time by a "borrowed" speeder.

"Jaina, I need you to go to Naboo, to the capital Theed. Keep an eye on how things are going there, how the Trade Federation is holding up in their...negotiations."

Jaina bowed her head to Sidious. "I shall see what I can do." She turned around to leave.

"And Jaina," he called. She turned back around to look at him. "Don't let your emotions get in the way."

* * *

**The Past**

"It's interesting to see you wearing a dress," Geist said with a laugh as they walked through the countryside of Naboo near a great waterfall.

"What? You expected me to wear something else on my wedding day?" Jaina smiled, walking arm in arm with him.

Geist said nothing in reply, only laughed a little more and stopped their walking. He turned to gaze at her, smiling full of happiness. "I'm glad we got married. This is the happiest moment of my life." She smiled at him in return. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she said softly. They leaned in together for a kiss. He put an arm around her waist, and with his other hand, he lightly touched her face. She put her hands on his chest and leaned foward, kissing him gently, her heart pounding.

They sat on the ground to watch and listen to the waterfall. He held her close, his arms around her. "So what happens now?" she asked.

"This," he said with a laugh, kissing her more. She laughed as well, but pulled away just a little to break off the kiss.

"I meant at home," she said softly. "What do I do about the Jedi? How can I possibly keep this a secret?"

"We'll worry about that as it comes," he replied in a whisper. "And not now. Because we're not going to worry about anythings besides us until that time comes to go home." And he continued the kiss she had broken off. 


	6. Chapter 6

**The Present**

Jaina crept around the corner of the building on the streets of Theed to the dark alley, in which she was to meet her contact. Though Naboo was no Coruscant, that didn't mean there wasn't still crime and dark things going in shadows down the street at night. Especially when she turned down the designated alleyway and walked slowly, only to be caught off her guard and grabbed by two strong men.

One held her from behind, a small dagger to her chin, the other in front of her with a menacing grin, pinning her arms to her side. She stopped struggling for a moment, trying to breathe, for the man behind her had an arm around her neck. He pulled her back to lean against the building, while the man in front of her came close to her, way too close, and put his face in front of her's.

"There are so many options to do right now," he said with a wicked laugh. He held up a blaster to her nose. "The end result by our employer having to do with putting a shot through your head. However...we were left with our imaginations for the middle part." Jaina glanced up and saw, at the end of that alley, the two people she was supposed to meet, watching her from that distance with their hands casually clasped behind their backs.

Jaina brought her knee up as hard as she could and kicked the blaster from the man's hand as he fell backwards. She spun around, the other man slashing wildly with his dagger, cutting the side of her face. With a clean swipe of her lightsaber she had quickly called to her hand, the man fell down, dead. She turned to the other one and put the blade swiftly through his stomach.

She spun back with a snarl and picked up the blaster with her gloved hand, stalking towards the end of the alley, where the two men stood in fear, about to bolt. One she recognized, yet the other was just a guard. "Nute Gunray," she said with a piercing look. "I'm not sure what you were trying to prove there, but I can assure you that nothing you try will work." She held up the blaster and shot the man down beside him, who fell to the ground with a thud. "Let that be a warning to you. And your employer."

She threw the blaster on the ground at the man, then turned and ran as hard as she could back to the hangar to leave Naboo.

* * *

**The Past**

_He's not going to like this_, was the first thought that came into her mind as Jaina was given a mission on her return to Coruscant. Quickly, before she had to leave that afternoon, Jaina went to say good-bye to Geist at what was now _their_ apartment.

As soon as she came into the door and had shut it behind her, Geist had put an arm around her waist and begun to kiss her. He started to pull her to the couch, but she stopped him with a nervous laugh. He looked down at her with a bit of concern, unsure of what she had meant by it.

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately. She looked up at him with a sort of apologetic look.

"I have to go to Ilum for a mission," she replied softly. He gazed at her, his eyes flickering with concern. "You know I was going to have to continue my regular Jedi life. I have to keep going on these missions. It's my duty as a Knight."

"But I'm worried about you," he said sadly. "I don't want you hurt. What if something happens to you?"

"Nothing will happen to me," Jaina insisted lightly. "I've survived all my missions before now."

He looked at her, wishing to go on, but not wanting to cause an argument between them. "At least let me come with you," he whispered.

"I can't let you do that," she said, looking at him sadly. "You have to let me continue my life. I'll come back home to you, don't worry so." He leaned down and kissed her longingly, then let go of her, watching as she left the room. 


	7. Chapter 7

**The Present**

Jaina left the ship in autopilot after she set its course to a random outer rim planet. She had no where to go, no place she could truly call home. She shook her head at the thought of what was her apartment, that empty space with a few rooms that had once been her secret sancutary of joy with Geist. But he was gone, and he wouldn't be there to kiss her when she got home.

She would only feel that lingering guilt that she had rooted deep in the pit of her stomach for these last twelve years. _It was all her fault._ They could've been happy. They could've been together. They could've started a life on their own, if only she had put away her pride to leave the Jedi.

Jaina broke down into those heavy, echoing sobs that had taken over her for more than a decade. The source of her never-ending suffering had once been the main cause of her deep joy. He had become her very being and would never leave her mind, for she was no longer whole without him.

She would do anything to have him back. To go back to that point of time, not too long after they had been married, to do _everything_ differently. To be _happy_ now, not _miserable_. To feel love, to have a home, to have a point in life.

He was right of course. She lived her life riskier now than she had ever before, even more than a year ago. She wanted to die. Because she certainly had nothing left to stay alive. She knew it, she woke up every day realizing it, and doing nothing to stop it, only wishing that somehow, perhaps her training would fail her. Instead of being able to come out of everything, she wanted to lose, for it all to be over.

Her hand reached up to gently touch the deep gash on her face, caked in dried blood. That was what her life had become. An eternal wound, never healing, only opening to bleed more and more. And it would never stop bleeding if she did nothing to help it.

* * *

**The Past**

Jaina entered the apartment and found, to her surprise that Geist had not rushed up to greet her for the first time ever at the door. They had been married for over a year. She stood there for a moment, looking at him, unsure.

"It's absolutely killing me," he said evenly, pain behind his voice and showing in lines upon his face. "You're gone all the time, never home." Jaina rushed forward to sit right next to him, attempting to give him a kiss. He stopped her, pushing her back a little less than gently. "I want my wife to be home with me, Jaina. I can't stand this anymore. I have to ask you to do something for me if you truly love me."

Jaina looked at him, feeling tears starting to form. She pushed them back, refusing to accept them. "Come, love, you know how things have to be. Perhaps you can come with me on a few-"

"No!" he exclaimed, her jumping in surprise. He leaned forward to her, passionately, putting his hands on the sides of her face. "Jaina, if you love me...you will have to leave the Jedi. I can't do this anymore. I need you here with me."

She looked at him, stung. "You know I can't do that," she whispered. "You knew exactly what was happening when you married me."

"Perhaps I thought that you were willing to sacrifice more than you are able." He stood up and turned. "I thought that I was more important to you than being a Jedi." He left and went to their room.

Jaina curled up on the couch and began to cry softly. She stopped her tears with a shuddering sigh, wiping her face dry. She stood and walked slowly to the room, standing for a moment in the door. She watched him lie still, his back to the door in the dark room, only the dim light from the hall shining upon him. She crawled onto the bed behind him and put her hand lightly on his arm. After a moment, he turned towards her, looking at her sadly, sorry for the argument. He reached up to gently touch her face with a sigh and leaned in to give her a soft kiss. Jaina didn't let it stop there and leaned forward again to kiss him, more insistantly. He put his arms around her, where they remained in an embrace for the night. 


	8. Chapter 8

**The Present**

After traveling to a few different planets, Jaina finally ended back up on Coruscant. She was tired, completely worn out, both physically and emotionally. She dragged herself to walk down the street, out of money by now from she had been carrying with her for her last mission. She had not yet contacted Sidious, nor had she been contacted by him.

_He thinks I'm dead. He knows what happened. He probably planned it himself._ Jaina sighed deeply, eyeing her building in the distance, thinking of the long way she had yet to go. People swarmed around her in certain sections of the city in the night life, going to and from cantinas and various clubs. She just wished they would get out of her way so she could collapse upon the couch at home to sleep, for she hadn't been in her bedroom for twelve years.

From her exhaustion, she found herself falling upon the pavement, grimacing at the dirty ground. She was pulled up to her feet, someone putting her arm around their neck and assisting her a ways. She felt about ready to pass out and realized the strange odor she had been noticing since she had landed. She didn't even get the chance to look at the man that was dragging her along before she fell unconcious.

She woke up, looking around her in bewilderment. She realized that she was sitting upon a bed in a similar hotel room to that which she had just killed the man about a week before. She sat up, in shock, noticing the other person that was there.

"That was my best friend!" the man yelled harshly, jumping up as soon as he noticed she was awake. She quickly reached for the Force, clearing her mind, and grasping out her hand just in time to catching his arm as it was going towards her throat. However, she was still weak, and he managed to get a tight grasp upon her. She fell down there to the floor, realizing that if she didn't do anything to stop him, she would surely die. But that's what she wanted, after all this time and thought. Wasn't it?

A strong will surged through her, survival instinct kicking in. She pulled and grasped at his hands about her neck. She couldn't do much and air was beginning to run thin. She resorted to her lightsaber, as she always did. She reached for it at her hip, to find it was missing. The man choking her laughed manically as she found it was on the table across the room. She didn't have enough strength to call it towards her with the Force. She clawed at him, pulling hard at his hands to get them from around her neck.

Everything was a blur to her. She didn't realize what was going on. She had managed to remove his hands, but he was coming towards her with a dagger now. She grabbed his arm, twisting it behind him, struggling to keep her hold. She had it in her hand now, and the man was trying to bring her down once more by grasping her throat, sitting over her on the floor. Seeming to be her only option, she jabbed up with the dagger, the man stopping in shock. He sat still for a moment and then fell forward, dead, upon her.

Jaina gasped for air, jumping up and shoving the dead body off of her. She slowly went to get her lightsaber and return it to her belt. She stood over the body, tears streaming down her dirty face. She had learned something important tonight.

She was tired of fighting. She was tired of killing. And she finally realized that, in fact, she did not want to die.

* * *

**The Past**

Jaina wiped at her eyes tiredly, waiting for the doctor beside her to speak. She was in a room of the Jedi Temple's medical center, finally finding that her bouts of sickness and nausea were too much to be taken lightly. She had finally gone to the doctor. She noticed as he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.

"What is it?" she asked, a hint of impatience with him. He turned to her with a sigh, still staring at the chart in his hand unbelievingly. She stared at him expectantly.

"You're pregnant, Jaina."

Her eyes widened in shock, her jaw dropping. "You must be mistaken, Doctor."

"I am not," he said, with a hint of hurt pride. "These machines are not wrong. We have run all the tests and found that you have a life within you. Quite strange really. I would've never expected it of a Jedi. It hasn't happened in such a very long time..."

"And it hasn't happened now," Jaina insisted, her anger rising. She stood and glared at him. "You're wrong, Doctor. And I suggest you look at your droids. And destroy those medical records."

"Jaina, I can't deny the truth. However, this doesn't exactly look good for you..." Jaina rushed forward and stood in front of him.

"Doctor, you must get rid of these records. We cannot have anyone knowing about this. This is my life we're talking about here!" she whispered, enraged, her face flushing.

"And the life of another you are now carrying. I cannot professionally allow you to refuse the life of your child," the doctor said, taking a step backwards.

"I see," Jaina said bitterly, her anger finally reaching a boiling point. "I have no other choice. I can't let you ruin our lives!" And to her shock and complete amazement, the doctor let out of grunt of pain, his face twisting. She looked down in horror to see the blade of her lightsaber in the stomach of this doctor. As she pulled it out, he fell to the floor.

_What made me do that?_ she wondered frightened. She turned, starting to run, getting out of the medical center. As she went through the doors, a few Jedi noticed her strangeness and grabbed her as she ran into them.

"What's wrong?" they asked concerned. She broke into hysterics, beginning to cry and collasped to the floor on her knees. 


	9. Chapter 9

**The Present**

Jaina rushed into the nearest cantina she could find, making her way to the bathroom, hugging her cloak around her tightly. As soon as she entered the restroom, she shut the door quickly behind her and took off the cloak, hanging it upon the door. Underneath were her blood-stained clothes.

She went to the sink, feeling repulsive for the first time since she had killed the doctor in the Jedi Temple. Desperately, she attemped to clean the stains from her shirt and scrubbed at her face as well, the wound from Naboo. She looked up at herself in the mirror. She looked every bit of her thirty-six years, if not a bit older. This wasn't how she had looked even a week ago, but everything was finally weighing down on her now.

By this time, as she left the bathroom, she realized that it had become early morning and light was streaming through the windows. She sat at the bar and got a little to eat in order to keep up some sort of strength, though it tasted awful in her mouth. She also got a glass of water, then stood to leave after she finished her meal.

She walked the long way down the streets, becoming more awake as she did so. She had missed nights of sleep before, and there was no way she could sleep right now. She had a location in mind, walking quickly towards it tirelessly. At last she stood in front of the Jedi Temple that loomed before her. Surprisingly, no one recognized her well enough from twelve years ago, and she walked straight into it, trying to blend in and not be noticed.

At last, she found who she wished to see, still on the first level, glad she had not had to go further. Her son. She slid behind a pillar, blocking herself from his view...as though he would recognize her anyways. Deep lines of emotion formed on her face, a longing to finally meet the young boy whom she hadn't seen since he was a baby in her arms.

She felt a hand grab her arm gently. She spun around quickly to see Mace Windu standing behind her. "I think you need to go now," he said quietly.

She wiped a tear from her eye, turning back to glance at him again. "I-I can't. I want to see him. I just want to see...my son."

"Jaina," he said firmly, yet with a touch of kindness, "you don't need to be here. I can't let you see him. You know it's not just you, kids aren't allowed to be visited by their parents. It's the sacrifice."

"I didn't bring him here. It wasn't my choice for this sacrifice," she said desperately, trying to break away from him, tears streaming once more down her face. "Please, I beg you."

Mace sighed. "Look at him once more. See? Now, you must go. I'll escort you to the door. There's nothing further you or I can do about this. Please just try to go on."

* * *

**The Past**

"I'm sorry, Jaina. The Council has decided to expel you from the Jedi Order. Your brush with the Dark Side has become too real in the murder of one of the doctors here at the Temple. You have also let your emotions get the better of you and have deliberately gone against the Code by getting married. You will not let anyone help you, and now it has gone too far and is too late."

Jaina fell to the floor on her knees, pain flowing through her body. She buried her face in her hands as she cried. She looked up to see Mace Windu standing over her, the Council behind him with sorrowful faces. She stood, knowing what she had to do next. She pulled the lightsaber from her belt and handed it quietly to Mace.

"You're dismissed." Yet Jaina stood still, not yet able to move. "Go home, Jaina. Go to your husband. Move on with the life that you had to live. Raise your child well, and may the Force be with you."

Jaina turned and walked sorrowfully from the Council Room at last, feeling the faces of everyone upon her as she left the Jedi Temple. She got a ride to her apartment and found herself standing just inside the door. Geist looked up at her, surprised she was home. She walked to the couch and fell upon it, into Geist's arms.

He kissed her forward and held her tight. "What's wrong?" he whispered at last. She looked up to him with a tear-stained face.

"I killed a man today. The doctor at the Jedi Temple. They all know now, Geist. And I was expelled from the Jedi." He held her tighter, kissing her on the head once more. Then finally, he asked the question he had been wondering.

"Why did you kill the doctor, Jaina?"

"I'm pregnant." 


	10. Chapter 10

**The Present**

Jaina parked the speeder bike at the curb of the building she usually met Sidious, going just inside the old abandoned warehouse, waiting for him to step forward. He was alone, as he had said. But she didn't trust him.

"There were a couple of men who tried to kill me," she said indignantly, her anger rising nervously as she stood in front of this man she knew to be extremely powerful in the Force.

"I know," Sidious replied lightly. "I have another job for you."

"You sent them, did you not?" she demanded. He kept walking towards her, and she took an involuntary step backwards.

"I did not," he said softly. "I would watch that tone with me, young lady. I can have you killed in an instant." Jaina turned, making towards the door. "I did not yet dismiss you, Jaina. I'm not finished. I have another assignment for you to do."

She turned to glare at him, her hand upon the door. "I am finished, Darth Sidious. I will no longer work for you. I am putting all this behind me. It's time for me to move on."

He took a few steps towards her threateningly. "It's over when I say it's over for you!" Jaina held her red lightsaber up just in time to block the blue bolts of Force lightning that was sent flying at her. "See? You work well for me. You know how to handle these things. Now, for the assignment."

"No," she said firmly, opening the door and stepping outside, still facing him. "I am finished." She blocked the last bit of lightning to her and jumped upon the speeder, hurrying away.

* * *

**The Past**

"You have to stop this!" Geist said, his voice rising after she had told him of her day. "You're going to the Dark Side, and I'm not going to lose you! Even though I'm not a Jedi, I can see what's happening to you, Jaina."

Jaina sighed exasperatingly, sitting down and wiping her eyes with her hand. "I'm perfectly fine, Geist. I have to keep a job and keep up my own end of the income. You're a mercenary, Geist. Just think of this as me becoming one, except by using a lightsaber and the Force to get what's necessary."

"Jaina, I hate the danger in my job. I don't want to know you're out there risking it like me. This is worse than being a Jedi! There are so many ways you can get hurt, so many things people can do to you!" He sat beside her, turned to face her with his hand supporting him up.

"I have to do something," she said softly, bowing her head. "I have nothing else to do."

He put his other hand on the couch across her so that he was leaning in front of her. "I don't want you doing this, Jaina. It's no longer just your life that you're threatening. You're threatening the very life of our child."

"It's no different from what I was already doing!" she said, her own voice rising.

He took the new lightsaber from her belt that she had constructed herself with a red blade, throwing the hilt across the room with increasing anger. "You're not doing this anymore!" he insisted, grabbing both of her arms and bringing her close. "You don't have the Jedi anymore. You don't have anything, but me! You're going to stay here and keep your family. I don't want to be second place anymore! This is going to be for the best, why don't you just let it!"

Jaina pushed him back and stood up. "Why do you insist on telling how to run my life in this marriage?" she demanded angrily. "You knew me from the beginning. You knew I was going to have to continue with the Jedi. If you expected me to devote everything to you, you should have done that before we were married. Now you have a pregnant wife with no job and you're not letting her do what she needs to survive."

He stood in front of her, putting his thumb on her chin and looking down upon her. "I expected too much of your love then?" She made no response. "Do you wish me gone?"

"No," she whispered, a tear beginning to run down her face.

He put his face close in front of her's, talking lowly. "How can I wonder every second if my wife is alive? How can I wonder in the future if you are to become pregnant again if someone has hurt you and the child is not mine? I cannot do this, Jaina. I love you and being second isn't good enough anymore." 


	11. Chapter 11

**The Present**

As soon as Jaina walked into the apartment in that strange tall building on Coruscant, she knew it would be the last time she would stay in this place she had once called home, though it was that no longer.

She changed into a fresh pair of clothes, her heart heavy with all the old memories. In the kitchen, she had a pack set out on the table, in which she was packing all her things she would take with her. Though it wouldn't be too much, there were things she would not like to leave without. And some of them were in the bedroom she hadn't been in for so many years.

When it finally came time that she had everything except for the few items from that room, she returned to the main room with that couch. She leaned against the back of it and fell down to the floor.

She had finally let go of that job. And it wouldn't be long before she would have to leave to escape Sidious forever. The time had come. That part of her life was over. The one thing that Geist had wanted, for her to give everything else up in order to be only his. And now he wasn't here, because it was too late. Twelve years too late.

She stood and slowly began to walk the length of the small apartment. Her life was nothing anymore. She had nothing left. But at least she was free from those bonds that came with the Dark Side, and there was a small burden lifted. Yet the most important person in her life was not there with her, and she would never get to be a mother to her only son and child.

At last she stood still and alone in the dark frame of the door to her bedroom.

* * *

**The Past**

Jaina lay, still tossing and turning, covered in sweat and much hotter than she should have been. Geist was at her side, quietly trying to calm her down, pressing a cool towel to her head, but she pushed his hand away impatiently.

"Where is he?" she mumbled. "Where have they taken him?"

"They're cleaning him up, Jaina. Calm down," Geist said gently, trying to hold her still. She sat up at last, but he hastened to make her sit still. At last, she calmed down a little, and their son was brought out to them.

Jaina took him in her arms, staring down at the beautiful face of the baby boy that they had named Aiden. She smiled at him, feeling very weak. She looked over at Geist's face. He glanced at her, a look of something that she could not recognize. "What is it?" she asked in a whisper.

He said nothing in reply to her question, just leaned over and gave her a kiss. He put his arm around her and touched the baby's cheek softly with the other hand. "He's amazing."

"Yes, he is," Jaina said, concern in her voice. She kept her gaze on him, watching him, but he kept his expression blank. "What is it?" she insisted again.

"I love you," he said, turning to look at her with a sad smile. He held her tighter and then continued to gaze down at his son as if he would never see him again. 


	12. Chapter 12

**The Present**

Jaina could hear the front door softly open and close. She knew who it was even before he stepped inside. She felt his hands on her upper arms as he stood behind her, gazing into their old room.

"Jaina," he said softly. She shut her eyes tightly and wriggled gently from his grasp, pained. She pushed past him and made her way back into the living room. She stood across the room from him, staring at him full of hurt.

"Going somewhere?" he asked her quietly, gesturing towards the kitchen where she had her pack laid out. She nodded, crossing her arms. "Where?"

"I don't know yet," she replied simply. He looked at her, expecting her to go on. She sighed. "I'm finished with it, Geist. I can't take it anymore. I told Sidious I quit."

He started to come towards her, a look of relief coming over his stressed face. She took a step backwards as a warning sign, wincing. He stopped, looking at her sadly. "I'm so glad you finally did that."

She looked down at the floor. "I went to see Aiden today."

"Why?" Geist asked her.

"I haven't seen him since he was three days old, Geist," she said, pain and anger rising to her voice. She looked him straight in the eye. "You took away what I had in my life. Everything. I have nothing left."

He looked at her, emotions crossing over his face. "Jaina, you pushed me away. I had no choice."

* * *

**The Past**

Jaina carried the child Aiden inside their apartment, setting the baby carrier down on the floor next to the door, holding him still in his arms. Geist went to their room and was quiet. She glanced worriedly after him, but decided not to follow him.

She got a bottle and prepared it, the baby gurgling happily in her arms. She fed the bottle to Aiden, carrying him to sit upon the couch in the living room. She was becoming extremely tired and so, she noticed, was Aiden.

He barely finished drinking the bottle before he fell asleep. Jaina did not wish to wake him, but instead placed the bottle on the floor at her feet. She leaned back, cradling the child close to her in her arms, settling comfortably in the corner of the couch. Before she realized it, she began to doze off.

She awoke with a start as the baby was being taken gently from her arms. "What are you doing?" she asked Geist sleepily. He leaned down and kissed her longingly. He stood again, holding Aiden, and looked down sadly.

"I'm leaving," he said softly, going to the door. He stooped down and grabbed a bag, slinging it over his shoulder so he could keep a good grip on the baby.

Jaina jumped up quickly, running towards him. "What?" she cried. "No! You're not leaving me! You can't! You just _can't!_"

He opened the door, but she tried to push it closed. "Jaina, let go of the door," he said softly. She shook her head, tears streaming down her face. "I have to go, Jaina. I've tried to fix it, really, I have tried so hard to get you to understand. But you won't listen to me. You refuse. I cannot let you do this to me anymore, and I won't let you endanger the life of our son."

"Where are you going? Where are you taking him?!"

"I don't know where I'm going. But I'm taking Aiden to the Jedi. I know he's Force sensitive, because they tested him at the hospital. He'll be raised with them, of course, and he'll have a good life."

She cried, her sobs becoming more and more audible. "Please, Geist," she whispered. "No." She grabbed his arm, but he gently pushed her away. "No, Geist. Please!"

He pushed the door open and started to walk down the long dark hall. She stood in the middle of the hall outside of their door, falling to her knees as she sobbed. The last she saw of them both was through her blurry vision as they went into the turbo lift and was gone from her life. 


	13. Chapter 13

**The Present**

"If you came here to push all this in my face again, then I ask you to please leave, like you did twelve years ago," Jaina said crossly.

"I didn't come to do that," he replied in a soft voice.

"Then what do you want from me?" Jaina cried. "You have done your harm. You loved me and married me. You made me happier than I had ever been in my life. And you took all that away in one day! You left me to be alone for _twelve years_! You took my son away. You left me, Geist. You ended that love we had together. How could you have done something like that? How can you expect to show up here again and me to forget it? I can tell you now, I haven't forgotten. I've thought of _nothing_ except my loss every day, every waking minute of my life!" She broke down crying once more, shamed to have done so in front of him, to let him see her like that.

He came slowly towards her, but as he reached out for her, she shoved him away. He tried to just touch her but she would not let him. Finally, he grabbed her more roughly than he would've liked, pulling her to him and putting his arms around her, holding her still. She struggled for another moment longer, but eventually she stopped, letting him hold her, and cried on his shoulder. They just stood there like that, him rocking gently and putting his cheek on her head.

At last, she leaned back from him, only a bit. He reached to her face, gently wiping her tears away. He pushed her hair back out of her face and stared down into her eyes with such an intensity of the same love he had for her the day they were married.

"I didn't come here expecting you to forget. I didn't come here to push it back on you and leave again. I came back to apologize to you, whatever it's worth by now. I came here, because I wanted you back and there was no way that I could possibly have gone on without being with you again. I love you, Jaina, and I want to come back to you."

He leaned down and kissed her, making it last, then again with even more intensity than the first. They broke off slowly, as though not wanting it to end.

"I love you, too. I'm so sorry," she whispered. She almost surprised herself, hearing those words. She could feel it again, forming in her heart. Those old feelings were still there however, pushing to make themselves known, wanting her to be stubborn and not accept him. But she was changing again. She wanted him back. She wanted that happiness that she herself was the original cause of them not having all those years ago. She wanted to have that love again. She leaned forward and kissed him again to assure herself of that, her final doubts disappearing.

"Come with me," he said softly, gently touching her face. "We'll go together, wherever it is the Galaxy takes us. Just as long as we're together. It's all that matters anymore."

Jaina nodded, her tears for once ceasing. He helped her gather her last belongings from their room, zipping closed the bag in which she had her things. Finally, they left the apartment together, making one final look at the place they had spent their old life before leaving to start their new one. 


	14. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

Jaina and Geist went to the Jedi Temple that night, wishing to meet their son, Aiden, once together before they left Coruscant. However, it was on that evening that Darth Vader, who had previously been known among the Jedi as Anakin Skywalker, had slain all those in the Temple. His troops were gone by time they arrived anxiously, eyeing the smoke along their way.

Hand in hand, they stepped among the bodies of all the Knights, students, and Younglings that had been viciously murdered. They found and mourned the death of their son, taking his body to give him a proper burial. They traveled to Naboo, where they buried Aiden in the cemetary beside the small chapel in which they had been married.

With nothing left for them and a need to escape the rising threat of Darth Sidious as the new Emperor of the Galactic Empire, Jaina and Geist quickly traveled to the outer rim to live the rest of their lives. Though it was saddened by the death of their one and only son, they were still able to love each other fully and live together once again.

* * *

_Author's Ending Notes: Well, I hope you enjoyed that!! I had a lot of fun writing this a while back, last fall. I decided to just put it all on here together and let you guys read it. Love to read reviews so whoever reads, please make a little comment or two. _


End file.
